It's time for a change

I used to be the type who hated change. I'd constantly find myself surrounded in a routine, watching everything else around me change. Over the past few years I've gained a lot of insight. Sometimes you can't keep everything the way you like it. Lifestyles change, people change.

I've adopted some really good friends over the past few years, and lost base with others I never thought I would. In this fight to maintain consistency I've discovered that sometimes change happens for a reason, people change. I try to embrace the new, however sometimes it just doesn't fit. I have tried to be friends with those who I use to hold so dear and I'm done trying. I need friends who are willing to give as much as they are willing to receive. I've found that in the friends I've acquired since I left high school. And although I will miss the time spent with those in the past, I look forward to new experiences with those in the future. They say you can't pick your family, but you can pick your friends. In this aspect of my life, I'm chosing to take control.

September isn't the only month for back to school

Yesterday after a talk with Jody, I decided to get in gear and just look all over the course selection on the school website for anything that I might be able to take. When I checked earlier, the choices were dismal. Most of everything I wanted to take, and everything I needed to take required a course in the fall semester making me out of luck. I decided that if I could find some courses to take in the winter I would. Although I'm still at a loss for what I want to do, I know I cannot stay home for another semester. I'm restless and miserable. I had planned not to go back to school unless I knew what I was doing, and I'm not all that sure I should be staying at the Mount. I do know, however, that since I've made this decision the cloud of dispair that has been hanging over my head has at least slightly diminished. I was very cautious with the courses that I picked, and where none are required courses for any direction I may take, I will be able to use them as credit toward a direction. With the help of Krystyna and Tawny I made the following course selections that I'm now registered in:

Introduction to Information Technology
An overview of microcomputer use. Topics covered may include terminology, computer hardware, computer ethics and the impact of technology on people. Students receive practical experience using an operating system, electronic mail and various packages that may include word processing, spreadsheet, database and presentation software.

Just the thought of that course makes me bored. However, should I decide to take a math major route, it is a required course so I have that base covered. Also I've been told by many people that it is an easy, low-maintence course. Can't beat that!

Social History of European Women from the Reformation to the Modern Day
A historical analysis of attitudes toward women from the Reformation to the modern day. Topics include historical demography of women, family life, different religious viewpoints, family law, birth control, witchcraft, education, women in revolutionary movements and the rise of the feminist movement.

Wow! I thought that this class sounded incredibly interesting, which is what I need. Also Tawny suggested I look into some women's studies courses and this is also listed as such (as well as a history course). I had it narrowed down to this or The History of Childhood: The American Experience. After talking to Krystyna (who was taught by both professors) we decided I would benefit more from the professor teaching this course. I would like her methods of teaching better, and would feel more comfortable approaching her. I should probably gain some experience writing essays, and Krystyna told me this professor will work with me to ensure I write what she's looking for.

Finite Mathematics
This course provides an introduction to the type of mathematics used in business, economics and the social sciences. Topics include: matrices, systems of linear equations, Gauss-Jordan elimination, linear programming, the simplex method, probability, Markov processes and game theory. Emphasis is on application.

I've been told one thing about this course: EASY! Which again, is what I'm aiming for. Also, I can use it for credit should I decide to major in math (it is not, however, a required course) so it's not a waste of time or money. I'm not sure about the professor for this course, I haven't heard anything about him. I went to the bookstore today to check out how much the book would be, $178!!! That's more expensive than the Calculus textbook! It better be a great learning tool!

Behaviour Modification
The study of the application of learning principles to address behavioural issues in a variety of settings. Examples are taken from clinical, institutional, home and community environments.

I had talked to Krystyna and Tawny and we thought that only three classes would be good enough for me, especially where I was taking a history course that will most likely require a lot of reading and essay writing. However, I thought I would just check out the Psych department and see what they were offering in the winter. In my second year I took an intro to psych class and I absolutely loved it. I was captivated by everything I learned and I kicked butt in that class. I was immediately taken with my professor as well from her personality to the way she teaches. In my three years of university she has been by far my favorite teacher. I had given up on getting into one of her classes this year as they always fill up fast. So imagine my shock when I saw she was teaching this class and there were two seats left! I thought that this was too good to be true! She might remember me and I'm used to her teaching methods. I registered, not 100% sure I'll take it, but just in case I decide I want to and am not left with a full class. I've always loved psych and part of me still wants to get into it. I especially love the behaviour aspect of it, so even if I don't go into Psychology, I have this class to take that I'm anticipating enjoying very much.

I have a lot of options open to me. I can go the math route, or the psychology route. I can go the general studies route as well if I want to. Also, the computer course comes in handy with either a psych or math major. My only concern is that I am still going to be part-time (because I only took one semester) so I won't be able to stop my student loan payments like I had hoped. So my dilemma now is should I drop a course or two because I won't be able to work as much and I'm going to have to pay bills? Or should I leave it as is? I don't really want to drop courses. We'll have to see how much money I get.

My next plan of action is to get my student loan application in the mail. It takes 4-6 weeks so I'm expecting word back by mid december at the latest, so I should get in in ASAP. The best part? I don't have classes until 1230 on Monday and Wednesday, 1030 on Tuesday and Thursday, and then I don't have classes at all on Fridays! This is the first year that's ever happened for me before and I'm so excited!

I think that is everything now. I'm very tired (I was too excited last night about registering today so I didn't get to sleep until after 3 and then worked the daycare!), so I'm going to go nap before I have to go to work. Any comments or advice you have on my plan of action, how many courses I'm taking, what courses I'm taking, etc. is well appreciated and you can leave me a comment if you like!

PS: And a BIG thank you to TAWNY for helping to dig me out of my pit of despair *wink*

Update, Update, Update.

So, today I got my hair cut. Only took like an inch and a half off, but it's still too short. I don't like it.

I didn't go to DAL's open house.

Oh. And Dad told me I have to start paying rent.

The anger swells in my guts, and i won't feel these slices and cuts

More Snow Patrol lyrics. I'm hooked, what can I say?
So the past few days have been quite tiresome. I find myself seemingly losing control of everything around me and it has me quite disgruntled. It's as though everything is falling apart and try as I may, I cannot piece it back together.
Have you ever had one of those times where you've completely forgotten who you are, what you're doing here, what purpose you serve if any? I feel like I don't know myself, the self that I've become. I find myself mourning the loss of the dedicated, determined, goal-seeking girl I once was. I feel like I've lost my best friend and I have no way to get her back.

I'm still at a loss for school. I still have no clue what I'm doing, where I want to go, what I want to achieve. Therefore I still haven't registered, haven't applied for student loans, and I'm not able to. Throw in the fact that I now have to start paying $132.00 on my student loans every month, I somehow have to pay for my internet, phone, and gas. Then we can't forget the fact that I am no longer covered under Dad's health plan so now everytime something goes wrong health wise, or I need to go to the dentist, I have to pay for it myself. What else you may ask? I have to save up, somehow, to buy a car and save money for school. Why? Because once I apply for student loans if I ever figure things out, they're going to see how much I worked and expect me to have saved a lot of it. Well let's remember this, I SUCK at saving money. A vacation to England, I may as well forget it.

I've really hit an all time low. The sad thing is, I'm starting to stop caring.

Psh. Why be a leader when you can be a follower?

1. FIRST NAME? Stacy

2. WERE YOU NAMED AFTER ANYONE? Nope. But Jods named me.

3. WHEN DID YOU LAST CRY? Oh boy...Sunday night at Dooly's I misted up while drunk?

4. DO YOU LIKE YOUR HANDWRITING? Sure do!

5. WHAT IS YOUR FAVOURITE LUNCHMEAT? Turkey Breast

6. IF YOU WERE ANOTHER PERSON, WOULD YOU BE FRIENDS WITH YOU? I honestly don't think so.

7. DO YOU HAVE A JOURNAL? This?

8. DO YOU STILL HAVE YOUR TONSILS? Negative!

9. WOULD YOU BUNGEE JUMP? Of course!

10. WHAT IS YOUR FAVOURITE CEREAL? Lucky Charms or Corn Pops

11. DO YOU UNTIE YOUR SHOES WHEN YOU TAKE THEM OFF? If they're a new pair of shoes, I do. Then once the excitement wears off, I don't care enough to.

12. DO YOU THINK YOU ARE STRONG? Sometimes.

13. WHAT IS YOUR FAVORITE ICE CREAM FLAVOR? Mint Chocolate Chip

14. SHOE SIZE? 9

15. FAVOURITE COLOUR? Pink

16. WHAT IS THE LEAST FAVOURITE THING ABOUT YOURSELF? Physically? My weight. Personality? My lack of motivation.

17. WHO DO YOU MISS THE MOST? Jods and Tawn

18. DO YOU WANT EVERYONE TO POST THIS ON THEIR OWN BLOGS? Yup.

19. WHAT COLOUR PANTS AND SHOES ARE YOU WEARING? Black pants, no shoes.

20. LAST THING YOU ATE? Subway - 6" club and baked ruffles.

21. WHAT ARE YOU LISTENING TO RIGHT NOW? Pink - Who Knew

22. IF YOU WERE A CRAYON, WHAT COLOUR WOULD YOU BE? Razzle Dazzle Rose

23. FAVORITE SMELLS? Vanilla, Coffee, Follement Chocolat (from Sephora), Pacific Paradise from Escada, the woods in the fall, and wood stoves in the winter.

24. WHO WAS THE LAST PERSON YOU TALKED TO ON THE PHONE? Brad.

25. THE FIRST THING YOU NOTICE ABOUT PEOPLE YOU'RE ATTRACTED TO? Height.

26. DO YOU LIKE THE PERSON WHO SENT THIS TO YOU? No one really sent it to me?

27. WHAT IS YOUR FAVOURITE DRINK? WKD, Bellini, Cosmos.

28. FAVOURITE SPORT? Watch - None. Play - Football or Frisbee :)

29. EYE COLOUR? Brown/Aqua Green

30. HAT SIZE? Who knows their hat size. Seriously. Whatever happened to one size fits all?

31. DO YOU WEAR CONTACTS? Sometimes

32. FAVOURITE FOOD? Indian or Chinese. Or Pizza.

33. SCARY MOVIES OR HAPPY ENDING? Both. But not cheesey (for either)

34. WHAT COLOR SHIRT ARE YOU WEARING? Red

35. SUMMER OR WINTER? Winter

36. HUGS OR KISSES? Either

37. FAVOURITE DESSERT? Cheesecake with pouring cream!

38. WHAT BOOKS ARE YOU READING? Sole Survivor - Dean Koontz

39. WHAT'S ON YOUR MOUSE PAD? Dolphins!

40. WHAT DID YOU WATCH LAST NIGHT ON TV? Didn't watch TV last night

41. FAVOURITE SOUNDS? Ocean waves, rustling leaves

42. ROLLING STONES OR BEATLES? I don't care.

43. WHAT COUNTRIES HAVE YOU VISITED? England (twice), Wales, France, Scotland, US

44. THE FURTHEST YOU'VE BEEN FROM HOME? Uh, Paris or Vegas?

45. WHAT'S YOUR SPECIAL TALENT? I have no clue.

46. WHERE WERE YOU BORN? Halifax.

47. WHO SENT THIS TO YOU? NO ONE! We TALKED about this already!

48. NEWEST THING YOU'VE TRIED? Sour Milk. Mark made me. It was gross. Well. It felt gross.

49. WHAT ONE THING WOULD YOU CHANGE ABOUT YOURSELF? My mole.

50. WHO DID YOU LAST SEND A LETTER OR CARD TO? Oh god...Uh...I don't know!

51. WHERE WOULD YOU MOST LIKE TO VISIT IN THE WORLD IF MONEY WAS NO OBJECT? Alaska or Corsica

52. DO YOU HAVE A PIERCING OR A TATTOO? two holes in each ear, and the anti-tragus of my right ear.

Oh what a night.

It's 6:29 am. I am waiting for Mark to get home and let me know that he arrived safely. My night consisted of three beers, three shooters called Liquid Cocaine, and a Mike's Hard Cranberry. Then we went to the Apple Barrel. It was fun. I won three or four games of pool-very unusual. I'm still a little buzzed and I hope that Mom doesn't need me to get up in an hour and go to the daycare. That would suck a lot. I am freezing a lot and I should go to bed but I have to wait.

I haven't blogged in a long time, so here it is, my drunken blog.
Happy Canadian Turkey Day everyone!