Something I found interesting.

Many, many months ago my lovely sister Tawny started a boobie marathon. She posted a picture of her breasts and dared everyone else to do the same. Jody and Dawn both participated in this charade and harassed me relentlessly to also post a picture of my breasts. Tawny even went as far as to crop my face out of a picture taken back in 2003 and post it on her blog. While they looked fine, they could have looked better. The picture I'm about to show you may surprise you, as I didn't even know my breasts looked like this. Anyways, I'm FINALLY posting a picture, so you can all stop whining about it (and yes, it was taken with the camera that Jody and Andy gave me, under the condition I'd post my picture). It's a silly picture, with a silly pose, but it gets the idea across.

There's a reason why I never believe in horoscopes.

Monday while I was on my bus ride home I was flipping through an abandoned newspaper. There wasn't much it in that was of any interest to me, but for some reason I read my horoscope. I never read horoscopes as I'm not in the least bit astrological and I don't believe in them. They never come true--at least not for me.

Anyways, Monday's horoscope informed me that I would be surprised by a sudden rush of wealth, either in the next week or within the month.
Well. How ironic is it that yesterday morning I got a call from student loans who required more information to assess my loan and once I gave it to them said my loan would be assessed that day. You're wondering where the irony is right? Today I called. They aren't giving me any money. What? Yeah.

THEY. ARE. NOT. GIVING. ME. ANY. MONEY.

At first I freaked out. I wanted to cry, I wanted to scream. I wanted to curse the Student Loan Department to the the blackest depths of hell to anyone who'd listen to me. But I didn't want to get kicked off the bus (yes, I was on the bus, AGAIN). I sat on the bus thinking about what I was suppose to do now. I'd have to drop out of school. I'd lose all the money I spent on books because I can't return them now. To think, things were going so well. Bollocks.

However, I pulled up my socks and I've come up with these solutions:
I went to my bank and I have an appointment with them on Friday morning for a Student Line of Credit.
If that doesn't work, I have some money saved up, and I can charge the rest on my credit card.

They aren't ideal solutions, but hopefully they'll help me. I swear to god, I must want school bad to deal with the stress I've been through the past three years.

The End.

PS. This doesn't help my financial situation seeing as how I was trying to save for a trip to England in May, which I'm so desperately going to need after the next 4 months, but now am EXTREMELY unlikely to get. Bollocks.

PPS. I said Bollocks twice. You're not imagining it, and no...I do not know why.

I'm an insult to the stereotypical university student

So I was sitting here tonight, fairly bored. I had updated my sidebar and was debating going to bed at 9:00 on a Friday night when I thought, well I could blog couldn't I? I'd be meaning to for quite some time, not that I have much to report. I was going to hang out with Krystyna tonight, but she went to work; and I had tentative plans with Kathryn but I guess she thought I was going to contact her earlier in the day and made plans to go to a party (to which she invited me, but it's a girl in her program - PR - throwing it and I wouldn't know anyone. Not to mention I have to work tomorrow). So here I am.

School is going surprisingly well. I got a 100% on my first math quiz, which isn't really saying much because it was on material we did in high school. Nonetheless, aside from the professor being totally out to lunch, I think it will be alright.

The information technology course is ridiculous. Honestly, I'm expecting an A+ in that course. If I get anything less than an A I don't deserve to own a computer. I'm sure it will get harder but the first lab we had due involved: minimizing/maximizing a window, switching programs, pointing to an icon on the desktop, creating a shortcut on the desktop, searching for things using a search engine, etc. It feels so good to drop $500 just to reinforce things I already know, haha. I'm so kidding.

My history and psychology course are both completely facsinating. I find myself sitting there totally wrapped up in what the professors are saying that I'll look at my notepad and see I haven't written anything for quite some time (which is fine because everything we discuss is psychology is from the text book). I have to write a paper in psych about a behaviour that I do that impacts my daily life. I've chosen my sleeping habits (you know, how I never go to bed before 12) and I've begun writing down a record of when I go to bed and wake up so I can include graphs and statistics in my paper.

I'm hoping for great marks this semester. I don't know if I'm setting myself up to be let down or if I'm giving myself that added incentive to work my ass off. Either way I won't know until the end of the semester (and I'm hoping I have something to celebrate to go away). Don't worry, I'll keep you guys updated :).

Back in the game...somewhat

Yesterday morning as I sat on the bus I quickly became anxious about the days events. I was beginning a new semester after eight months of mindless activity and I was overwhelmed with a variety of emotions. The idea of returning to school excited me for I felt I was wasting my life away since I decided not to return. But then I began to wonder if it was the smartest move after all. Nothing has changed since I had been in classes last; I'm not any closer to figuring out what I want out of life or what I want to achieve.

However, overhearing a conversation between two girls at the back of the bus I remembered what I didn't want to be. There was a twenty something girl talking about her minimum wage job and her child, while cursing like a sailor. If nothing else, that is why I was on the bus on my way to school.

Once I got to school it was everything that I loved and hated at the same time. I loved the feeling of success and motivation as you sit in the class on the first day. There is an inescapable feeling that you can do this, that you are capable of getting a good grade, understanding the course, and impressing yourself. But as usual, as I looked around the classroom and saw people chatting with one another, I realized just how alone I am and how I've never had people I know in my classes.

I was not discouraged though. I went back today and even went as far as to spend my morning bus ride brainstorming career options; what interests me, what I could do with those interests, and which of those interests can be combined. So the next time I sit down with a career counselor, I might have something substantial to tell her.

Although I am scared to death of not knowing anyone (and yes, I realize I can meet people), I am mostly excited. Excited to test myself and learn about myself. To prove to myself that I do have it in me to succeed; to not let this be like any other semester where I start out feeling this way, but end up discouraged and angry. It doesn't matter if I don't have a career at the moment to work towards - if all else fails, I'll end up with a degree of some form.

Now, because I don't have school or work tomorrow, and for lack of anything better to do, I'm going to go watch a movie.